DELICATE // THUNDER

I recently spent a whole afternoon catatonic on the couch, staring blankly at old episodes of CSI and scrolling mindlessly through Pinterest. Fully tuned-out and dropped-out. No brain noise at all. The afternoon then segued into drinking vodka-orange-and-pineapple with my housemate in the backyard, while our partners barbecued some stuff and we talked about UFOs, weird people we knew, and the environment. I think that afternoon on the couch marks the official peak of my burn-out and collapse into kind-of desperately directionless watching/scrolling/drinking and denial of all the – constructive – things I was supposed to be doing.

So, I’ve been a bit quiet on here lately, mainly due to the kind-of burn-out experience. But I’m still here, and this is a bit of what I’ve been doing (list adapted from Meet me at Mike’s)…

Making: Plans. Always.

Cooking: Pear and parmesan salad, anything vaguely Mexican

Drinking: Alternating between whiskey+dry and tea

Reading: Recently, Tom Robbins's Fierce Invalids Home from Hot Climates and Tim Winton's The Turning, and just started Jonathon Franzen's Freedom

Wanting: This and this from Spell, Optical Intrusion jeans from Evil Twin, and this from Rejoice the Hands. 

Looking: Through the archives of my favourite artist of the moment Aminah Slor’s blog

Listening: To Pandora -- Lynyrd Skynyrd and Led Zeppelin stations

Wasting: Beautiful days and evenings, by sitting inside working on sketches.

Wishing: I didn't have to live in a city with no immediately viable options for swimming in natural bodies of water.

Enjoying: Waking up at 5am to chip away at to-do lists – mornings are my peak action time.
Growing: A lettuce garden and some mint. I’m really pleased that Humble hasn’t dug them up.

Watching: Documentaries on Pink Floyd and giant squid – not in the same one, unfortunately – CSI marathons and the highlights of the NRL finals.

Waiting: For a chance to escape and hit the road

Following: The constant stream of inspiration and motivation that comes out of the online creative community.

Liking: Every little new-campaign teaser Sugarhigh and Lovestoned are posting online.

Collecting: Biological specimens to press in sketchbooks, inspiration from natural sculptures and oddities to add to drawings.

Wondering: What I should do next.

Loving: My partner. And my dog, the Princess Weenie Mutt. And scones.

Missing: My family and my home. A lot.
Hoping: That our rented house doesn’t sell. Or if it does, that we find a way cooler place to live, where we can still have fires and puppy parties.

Marvelling: At spring in Melbourne, and how this city's awful/crazy weather makes you incredibly grateful for a day of solid sunshine.

Needing: More time

Smelling: Stolen jasmine flowers, toasting sourdough

Wearing: Black jeans and Harley boots (always), boyfriend’s black shirt that I bleach-dyed and screen-printed, and loads of silver and turquoise. Usually also some bright green and yellow hand-knitted house socks my housemate’s mum gave me.

Noticing: The ebb-and-flow of creative drive and burn-out, tolerance and rage, triumph and defeat. And that women, especially and sometimes inexplicably, can be very mean to one another.

Knowing: Way more about Adobe Illustrator than I did last week.

Thinking: About buying big canvases and starting some paintings.

Giggling: At Humble's attempts to be brave/sneaky/a human
Feeling: Cautiously optimistic